Tip #1
Understand that ADD/ADHD is not a choice. It is not their way of being defiant. It is not them expressing their independence. It is a real, valid, scientifically documented difference in learning styles. Notice I do not call it a disorder or deficit? That is because it is not. It is a gift. If people with different learning styles were all labeled with a disorder, imagine how much we would be spending nationally on an annual basis to support and teach these kids. ADD/ADHD is a defferent way of learning and thinking. The first thing you can do as a parent is accept that it is not a choice, believe that it is not a disability, release any guilt you may have about your role, however large or small, in your child's ADD/ADHD. You also have to acknowledge that learning some different ways of dealing with your child can make your days (and nights) so much calmer and more productive. I promise you, the time you spend learning different ways of coping with an ADD/ADHD child will c ome back to you ten-fold in the quality of your relationships.
That is the tip for this week. It is not a small task, changing your thought process regarding ADD/ADHD. So many of us have been conditioned to believe that ADD/ADHD is a challenging disorder that must take a lot of patience, arguements with the teachers, constant struggles with our children, and any number of co-morbid disorders, it is hard to look at it as a gift. But it is. If positioned correctly, you will see enormous changes in your child/ren, however to start the change you must believe. So, this week I want you to work on your belief set. Figure out what you tell yourself about ADD/ADHD and parenting a child with this learning style. Once you figure out what you believe about it, you will have an easier time changing that, and re-framing it to the gift that it is.
Please feel free to email me with the beliefs that you come to realize you hold around ADD/ADHD. I am sure you are not the only one with your particular belief set, and others may benefit from knowing they are not alone in it either.
So, until next week, take care and stay strong!
Tracy Hoobyar is a personal trainer for academic, personal and professional excellence for people with ADHD, and those who love them. After graduating from the University of Nevada, Reno with a degree in Psychology and working with children as a substitute teacher and volunteer, she learned what an incredibly widespread problem ADHD can be. Through her training in NLP, Psychology, and her experiences working with all these children, she has finally developed a unique yet effective program to help those living with ADHD. She blogs about various parenting issues affecting all those concerned and she is a frequent guest blogger on Sew Cute’s blog. Learn more by visiting www.ADDvantageForLife.com
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